Sunday, September 25, 2011

Talking about oneself is... Tedious.

Nowadays we can upload our feelings of the moment, thoughts, images and movements to a public forum on the internet whenever we want, we can bare our souls to a group of people who may or may not know us, drunkenly declare our love to someone so the world can see it and delete it the next day, pretending that it never really happened. Who really notices anyway, there is so much information being added and updated by the minute that it literally is in one ear and out another, right?

I’ve always found it really hard to talk about myself. Unless you actually ask me, I probably won’t volunteer any real information about myself, especially if I am not close to you. If you are a close friend I may talk more about myself, but tend to listen more than talk. One of my friends told me yesterday that I needed to be more vocal about my thoughts, feelings, emotions and activities, so that people would remember them. But I just can’t… I will say something once and hope that it is remembered, and then usually get upset when it isn’t. I just don’t want to be that person who continuously talks about herself. I honestly don’t really see what I can actually say that will interest people that much anyway. And in the end, it’s much easier to write it all down and hope that it may be read one day, rather than talk about it with a random person who happens to be in the vicinity, wait for their reaction, and then most likely get the usual “well that reminds me of when that happened to me…”. OK, that was probably a bit over the top, I am basically just trying to say that I find it extremely difficult to talk about myself, and if you want to know something you really have to pull it out of me. I don’t think that will change anytime in the near future.

I don’t know, maybe I am asking for too much… I have a good memory and tend to remember things about others. If we are close friends I don’t need Facebook to remind me it’s your birthday and I know that you prefer chocolate over red velvet. Or I will remember that you have an exam or big test tomorrow and will wish you luck beforehand. I am the one to send you a “safe flight” text before you get on a flight just because I want you to know I’m thinking of you when you are travelling. I try really hard to remember every important detail, but sometimes I forget too (especially when I write a note about it!), but I really try.

I think this is why I get unnecessarily upset when people forget about something important I am doing. Going back to what my friend said yesterday: maybe I should remind people constantly about something, and in the end I won’t be disappointed when they don’t actually forget. But then again, I just can’t bring myself to. I just get annoyed at your for not remembering, but I will never say that either. Because, in the end, does it all really matter? (Yes, but I won’t say that either).

Enough talk about me. There are a lot more interesting things happening in the world today, like Saudi women maybe finally getting the chance to vote (in 2015), women protesters being pepper-sprayed by the police during the Occupy Wall Street protest yesterday, the continuing famine in Somalia…

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