I've been quite reflective this week, a little more than the past few weeks anyway, less nostalgic, more reflective on the present and the near future. Last week I suffered from a 7 day headache that just wouldn't go away, and I even had to resort to Advil on one night, which I tend to try to avoid unless I really need it. I know, I know, with the sheer amounts of alcohol I used to consume I shouldn't really be worried how one Advil can effect me, should I? I just never liked taking pills, and still feel the same now. And I also feel like I should stay tough and get through any type of pain without help, because that's what tough-girls-who-don't-need-your-help do. All I really needed was a few days of peacefulness, away from most people, a good book, a few quiet shifts at my theatre/bookstore job, and most importantly, two nights of uninterrupted sleep. I kind of got all of that, so by the time Sunday came around, I was feeling much happier and the weather had also decided to go into full-on summer mode, which always helps to lift my spirits too.
By Tuesday I wasn't feeling as happy anymore. People had partied too much over the weekend and were not going out drinking, which, you know, they should, seeing as this is how I pay my rent, getting people drunk and hoping they will tip me well. Although I must say, those quiet nights sure do bring out the insane. I had to kick one person out on each night I worked this week, just because they decided to start fights with bar regulars. The best part of it was on Tuesday night around 3 am, when I actually raised my voice (very rare occurrence), which shocked every one of the 5 people in the establishment so much that everyone went silent. Maybe I should use this tool more often as a weapon against drunken idiots who pick fights on the basis that "they know more about world politics than us dumb foreigners".
In any case, I decided to take things as they came this week - I kept losing at Chess with Friends, I didn't write a word of legible content, or even have an inspirational writing idea, my little brother has decided to disappear from any form of communication and I felt like everything was going to go awry anyway, so why not just let it run it's course and bear with it? I feel like there were other things that made me a little grumpy work-wise earlier this week, but only because I always tend to feel responsible for everything and then pissed off when it isn't done right. But there are actually much worse things happening in the world, as always, (people eating other people in this country anyone?), so my little irks and complaints really aren't important on the grand scale of things, are they? I mean, I'm still alive, I'm still myself, and I won't be eating someone's face off on a highway ramp anytime soon. (As a side note, don't get all curious about what the cannibal's victim looked like and decide to look at a picture of him. It will give you nightmares, I promise).
Funnily enough, amidst all of this talk of zombie apocalypse and other end of world drama, I have been re-watching season 7 of Buffy the Vampire Slayer. The season which culminates in what should be a real end of world hell mouth re-opening with the First Evil building an army of ancient vampires to kill all that is good and take over planet earth. Good old evil vampire horror with some great ass-kicking Good against Evil fights (and Spike being all wonderfully endearing with his new soul and all that goes with it). I think I may have scared the dog this morning while practicing my zombie-deterrent high kicks and punches, so it may be more safe for the world if I start training in a more discreet fashion for the time being, by running a few miles a day again. Need to build up that endurance just in case, because you never know what is going to happen. For all I know we could be living on top of a hell mouth that is going to open and spew out thousand of zombie-like vampires.
I still love this TV show as much as I did when it first came out - it could have been so silly, like the original movie, but ended up being super smart and fast-paced, with some excellent characters and also brilliant character development. And I always cry at the end of each season, however many times I have seen them. And some good old world-saving tactics never fail to make me feel happy, especially when it is heavily laden with sarcasm and wit.
So now it's Thursday, and I feel the need to write in here while I am at work at the theatre, listening to Jonathan Pryce's voice as he plays in Harold Pinter's The Caretaker, just because I haven't posted anything in here since last Sunday. Promise I will write about something more interesting during my next shift on Saturday...Which reminds me... While I was walking across the street earlier, on my way here, I was hit by a sudden smell of hot concrete and petrol fumes which immediately took me back to my trip to India in 1993. I could see myself stuck in traffic in a rickshaw, hot and sweaty and wondering if we would make it back to the pilgrim center in one piece. I want to go back and experience it all again, but as an adult this time (I just realised right this moment that my mum was the age I am now when we went to India). But I also want to go to Africa and travel around there. I need to go to France (this isn't even an option anymore, I have to go back this year). I must make sure to get all of these trips in before the zombie apocalypse really takes off and travel becomes a difficult undertaking. I don't think fleeing to a desert island is really a viable option due to the fact that there may be smoke monsters and Others lying in wait.
I'm having way too much fun creating all of these survival techniques in my head. There must be a short story in here somewhere. Which reminds me... I need to write a story about my ex-CIA/MI-5 cab driver who picked me up on Wednesday night. Fascinating (even if it was all a figment of his own imagination).